A scientist once told me that in a black hole, no light can escape and no matter can survive because the force of gravity is so great that all matter becomes anti-matter.
In other words, a void.
Another scientist added that it is possible that perhaps gravity forces time to slow down so much that on the other side of the black hole, gravity and time reverse themselves and emerge in other universes or dimensions perhaps beyond our comprehension.
In any case, it is the anti-space / time at the center of the black hole that interests me.
It interests me because I am trying to understand how it came to pass that I have a black hole where my heart once was.
One moment, I was standing in an elevator with her and the next moment, she was gone.
I think perhaps one earth second passed, and then instantaneously the cluster of muscle fibers that comprised my heart were replaced by a very palpable void.
The void immediately affected my entire being. Strangely enough, the anti-matter acted like a kind of generator, and I could still walk, talk, think, eat, sleep as if I had a human heart. However, one thing I could no longer do was feel.
I have been living with this black hole for a while now, and I am getting used to its effects.
This empty space inside of me, this place of no place, this timeless nothing, is mine and mine alone.
One day, she may return to me.
She might reach into me and remove this cold expanse and give me back my heart. Perhaps it will only take one earth second to happen. The elevator door will open, and by the time I embrace her, I will once again be a living, feeling human being.
Until then, it really doesn't matter, because time and space are just a fantasy, after all.